Werder Bremen v Bayern Munich: Bundesliga season opener – live | Bundesliga

31 min Bayern are just too good at the moment. Bremen can’t get their strike partnership of Fullkrug and Ducksch in the game.

28 min There’s a break in play why Bittencourt receives treatment. He’s fine.

25 min Sane’s dipping corner from the right is met by Kane, whose mishit volley from eight yards hits a defender and bobbles through to Pavlenka. That was a decent chance, though I suspect he saw it late.

23 min Ducksch’s tame free-kick is easily saved by Ulreich.

23 min Upamecano foulds Weiser 25 yards from goal. Ducksch is over the ball…

22 min “Not a Spurs fan, but I always admired Harry,” says Mary Waltz. “First his amazing skill for scoring. Second, he just seemed to be a good bloke. I am happy for him to be away from the Spurs sad soap opera.”

21 min: Mazraoui hits the post! Coman scurries down the left, then plays the ball back to Davies on the edge of the area. He lays it square to his fellow full-back Mazraoui, who crashes a lovely shot that beats Pavlenka and brushes the outside of the left post.

20 min Ducksch is booked, a little harshly, for a high challenge on Upamecano.

19 min: Just wide from Musiala! That was lovely play. He received the ball on the halfway line, to the left of centre, beat his man with ease and headed straight towards goal. Nobody came to challenge so he got to within 22 yards and rifled a low drive just wide of the near post.

15 min Weiser beats Davies with a stepover and stands up a good cross into the middle. Fullkrug can’t quite reach it and Ulreich claims.

13 min The disallowed goal aside, Bayern have been in control. Kane’s imaginative pass is just too heavy for Musiala, who made a late run into the area.

11 min The free-kick is touched off to Kane, whose stinger is blocked by a charging defender.

10 min Kane is fouled 30 yards from goal by Lynen. I say ‘fouled’; Lynen got the ball and then tripped Kane in his followthrough. Either way, it’s a free-kick to Bayern in a good position…

9 min: Fullkrug has a goal disallowed for Bremen! It’s a shame as it was a good goal, a close-range header from a superb Ducksch free-kick. But Fullkrug went too early and was clearly offside.

6 min At Spurs, Kane had only one Son Heung-min. Here he has one on either side, such is the pace of Sane, Coman, Gnabry or whoever the flip they play. I suppose more teams will defend deep against Bayern than they did against Spurs, but you’d still imagine Kane will get a whole heap of assists this season.

The defending was dreadful, but an assist is an assist is an assist. Sane knocked an angled ball into Kane on the halfway line and kept running. Kane simply eased it first time into the space, knowing there was nobody behind him, and that allowed Sane to charge through on goal. Nobody was going to catch him, and once he got into the area he slipped the ball past Pavlenka with his right foot.

GOAL! Werder Bremen 0-1 Bayern (Sane 4)

3 min Coman cuts inside from the left and tries a one-two with Kane, whose return pass is fractionally overhit. Nice idea though, and those speedy Bayern wingers are going to love having him in their team.

3 min “I guess the interest of this game, for many people at least, is seeing how Kane thrives (or doesn’t) in his new environment; much like worldwide interest in An-An the giant panda,” says Charles Antaki. “As I recall he was ceremonially courted by the world’s zoos until it suited the People’s Republic of China to let him go. But also as I recall, he didn’t produce much, and dwindled away into a sad hulk. Hmm.”

2 min You’re just here for Harry Kane aren’t you? It’s okay, he hasn’t touched the ball yet.

1 min Peep peep! Leroy Sane gets the new Bundesliga season under way. Bayern, in their black away kit, are kicking from left to right as we watch.

Harry Kane high-fives his new teammaes, and then the players gather round the centre circle to pay tribute to the Bremen legend Horst-Dieter Hottges, who died in the summer aged 79.

The players line up for the national anthem, sung by a pair of fellas in what look like leather trousers. I think some of the home fans are booing.

“I’m watching the Hundred so you all don’t have to, Rob, while following the MBM of course,” writes Simon McMahon. “Don’t ask me what the score is, though. I just wish Eoin Morgan was my dad. And that he would bring Uncle Kev home with him more often.”

The players are in the tunnel, and Bremen’s kit still looks quite magnificent.

“Your assertion would trouble me more,” says Joe Pearson, “if I actually knew what the Hundred was. (Googles) Oh, it’s cricket. Still not troubled. Hope we can remain friends.”

We can, not least because the Hundred’s relationship with legacy cricket fans is… complicated.

“Love the line-up pictures provided by the clubs,” writes Jeff. “Harry Kane looks he’s donning his best ‘I’m your man, catch me if you can’ job interview pose, while Bittencourt’s doing an ironic slow clap in reply.”

“Just like every Saturday morning at 10am (3pm your time), this afternoon I am once again grateful to live in the USA (no exclamation points),” writes Joe Pearson. “Nottingham Forest vs Sheffield United is available on my tv. As is Werder Bremen vs Bayern. If l wanted to swerve, I could even watch the Little League World Series. I’m taking it back. USA! USA!! USA!!!”

I bet you can’t watch the Hundred though, can you.

“Hi Rob,” says Ruth Purdue. “Please wax lyrically about that look that Kane has on that team sheet.”

I missed this. My word! I can’t decide whether he looks lascivious, constipated or both.

Andy Brassell’s preview

This kit though

Team news: Kane starts

Preamble